BigGator5.net

…We have a stubbornness problem.

Alright, so I am clearly getting ahead of my story here. Let me back up little:

About a year ago (give or take a couple of months) I noticed one of our trees in the front yard infested with ants. This tree has plants hanging off it, that will die if it gets too cold (this will become important soon). So I report this to my grandmother, noting she needs to get some poison ant feed to kill these things off. She completely ignores me. I don’t know what to do, because I don’t really want to pester her too much.

In fall and winter of 2012, I start to worry because I have to bring these plants on in from the cold and they too are infested with ants. When we start seeing them in the garage and a couple of rooms, again I warn my grandmother to go out get poison ant feed. She goes out and gets …traps …and sprays, stuff that only solve the problem short term because they only kill the workers. We need the poison ant feed to kill the queen(s).

Now ants are almost everywhere in and around the house. The pool pump is broken (likely from the ants) and she STILL has not gotten the poison ant feed. She has called the pest company and will instead rely on them. I know for a fact they won’t help, because they only have sprays. I don’t have anything against them and it’s really not their fault. They are prevented service, not a extermination service. So I am going to wait until they come and in the coming weeks, tell her yet again, we need poison ant feed to get to the queens.

I partly blame myself. I could be more forceful on the matter, but I haven’t. However, time and again, my grandmother has outright ignored my suggestion to get the poison ant feed. I’m done. Anything I say will be ignored. I don’t know why, I am not suggesting she spend some money “just because”. I do feel a rush of anger everytime she complains about these ants. I’ll just wait until the ants get so far out of hand, take her to Lowes or Home Depot, and have a store clerk suggest the poison ant feed. I bet you real money she’ll listen to him/her.

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)

If you missed it:

And so I get to the main quest Diplomatic Immunity and, fuck me, was that hard. I am playing a Dark Elf Mage (I’ve also joined the Imperials), so it was hard for me. I haven’t shied away from using thief skills, but I am trying to play this as a straight good guy as much as possible. I hate to say this, but it’s taken me three days to figure it out. I learn quickly that I needed to save before I open any door in the Thalmor Embassy. The reason it has taken me longer than it should, is that my nephew has an older Xbox that heats up and he wants to play his Xbox/Skyrim too (which is completely understandable). I was able to kill Rulindil, but not Gissur. Both Etienne Rarnis and Malborn survived, so I can look forward to seeing them both later.

So I am going to leave the Main and Imperial quests behind for now and focus on the College Of Winterhold quests for a while. I will try not to start any new side quests and hopefully get to level 20 (currently on level 12) before I rejoin the main quest.

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)

“Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.” -Friedrich Nietzsche

I lay awake in the waning hours of 2012. Sleep has not been my friend in the last few weeks. Something is follo- no, stalking me there. I do not know what it is, or even if its friend or foe. All I know is that I am… afraid…

My eyes are heavy, too heavy. The caffeine that fills my belly is not helping me. Twenty-one hours since I slept fitfully and I know for sure that my follower, my stalker will reach me if I go to sleep now. I don’t know how I know this, I just do.

It is clearly dark with only one light souce in the room. I think to myself that I should turn on more lights, but I do not move. The fan above me is turning the air. I watch the countdown to the next year and wish I could stop it. Those smiling faces on the two dimensional moving screen. I can’t stand it. It is clearly a mask that they are wearing. Do they not know, that they too are being stalked? Do they not know that this thing comes for us all?

I can’t take it. I close my eyes, just for a second. I tell myself I should open my eyes before too long.

Seconds pass. I think that this is long enough. No! Open my eyes! (more…)

I know now why I am so depressed. I died on November 7th 2012. Oh my physical body still lives, but mentally and emotionally, I died that day.

However I, BigGator5, am still alive. And without any real emotional support, I have gone down a deep dark path. And I like it. I am still a conservative with deep moral values, but at the same time I want to see this world burn in the worst possible way. It is corrupt, morally bankrupt, and completely beyond redemption. I, for one, no longer want to be a part of it. Everything needs to come down, the foundations need to be uprooted, and humanity needs to start from day one again. It is not enough to start a new game, it is time to toss the broken game completely out and write a new one.

This does not mean I am omnicidal in any way. It just means I will not play the game any more. I quit. I will neither help to bring the world down or prop it up, but I have no doubt in my mind that it will collapse in due time. All I have to do is sit back, kick-up my feet, and wait. When the end does come, I will just laugh… and laugh… and laugh… and laugh…

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)

Well, freed a life is more like it. You will see why I say this soon enough.

A (big) Southern Black Racer got itself caught in one of those “sticky” traps you put in your garage. My family asked me to take care of it. I was sad when I saw it was a Black Racer. I reached down to pick it up and it MOVED!

I took it outside and removed it from the trap, but the thing was still really sticky. I had to hold it’s head down, because it kept lashing out at me. I know the things are nonvenomous, but I didn’t want it to strike me while I was helping it. Here Are some pictures:

The fact that I was able to take these photos about ten minutes after I freed the thing, saddens me a little. I fear the sticky stuff on the trap is holding it back. I hope it can overcome it and move on. However if it is going to die, it will at least now die free instead of stuck on a sticky trap in some dark garage.

[UPDATE] The snake has moved off, albeit rather slowly. I don’t know if this is a good or bad thing: On the one hand it is moving, but on the gripping hand these snakes are supposed to move fast. Only God knows if it will survive.

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)

Yeah. It’s 2013. Not sure if this will be a happy year for me.

I have been epicly depressed since shortly after the election. As you can tell, I am completely pessimistic about the next four years. This includes both personally and the future of the United States. I have also joined the Let It Burn movement.

I have also been chronically sick now for weeks. I have not been able to stop stiffling or sneezing, no matter what I do or take. I have given up on medication, since nothing is working. It has gotten less severe (including my depression), but hasn’t gone away.

Thanksgiving was good. Since this is a leap year, we didn’t have the time share at Orange Lake. It was an ok Thanksgiving. Nothing more to write about that.

Christmas was better. I got a Once Upon A Time (if you are not watching this show: I suggest you do, it’s a great show) t-shirt for Christmas. It was the best thing I got this year, but granted I didn’t get or want much. I also got a small chess board (with cheap wooden pieces) and I played a nice game of chess with my Dad, which will be the best memory for this Christmas.

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)

*snap*

And just like that, Halloween is over. This makes me sad. However me and Blake had a good time last night. We walked the neighborhood and he got a ton of candy. Both of us have a mild sugar hangover this morning, but we are doing well. Good times.

You know, I’ve said this a million times, but it bears repeating: Halloween is not for kids, it is for parents of kids or adults who are of the young of heart. I love dressing up myself and taking Blake out to get candy. It is the current highlight of my year. However he’ll be ten next year and may not want to go out. I guess I’m just going to have to have kids myself.

DragonGate, we need to talk. :p

Speaking of DragonGate, I think I will join her in NaNoWriMo this year. I am not going to open an account on NaNoWriMo’s site, I am just going to write. Completely informal. And I have been thinking of writing a Doctor Who fanfic. I know I said that I am done with fanfiction, but since I have been thinking of doing NaNoWriMo this year, a Doctor Who story has sprang up in my head and I can’t get over it. If I can pound out the first 1,667 words today, I will commit to the full thing for the rest of the month.

(UPDATE): Well, that was a let-down. I wrote this and then I had to do other stuff. Oh well. I’m actually thankful this happen, I wasn’t really interested in writing fanfiction again.

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)

…And of course he is now in jail.

I didn’t think he actually hit me. Up until now he has come up to my personal space and threaten me, but never actually did anything about it. He called me out and so I decided to listen to him, again thinking he wouldn’t do anything. I didn’t say a word to him and I kept eye contact with him. There is no honest way of talking with the man, so I didn’t even try. I did not threaten him in any way. He then jumped up and hit me in the mouth. Broke a tooth.

This time, I am not dropping the charges. People promised me he wouldn’t return and that was broken fairly quickly. So I am unlikely to listen to any more promises.

I am not happy about this, but he had plently of opportunities to move out if he didn’t like living here. He was getting money from the VA. He had a brand new car (which he wreaked, btw). He didn’t have to hit me nor did I force him to do so, I was no threat to him.

Let this be a lesson to everyone: Physical violence solves nothing.

Well, see ya’ later!
(more…)